blog #7 nigger vs. nigga

English isn't my first language so these two words do not affect me at all. I learn them as normal slang but I was never told the meaning behind them until was until 5 years of living here I was. The first time I heard the word "nigga" I just recently had started 9th grade in a different place with only being able to speak 5 words of English. A white kid called a dark skin kid that , they acted normal and they even shook hands like friends. so my first time with the word was normal so then later I realized it was what you called a dark skin person but I still didn't know it was a racist word. so when my blood cousin who is very dark skin , moved to live with my family and, I used to call him the "nigga as a sign of friendship and love.after I found out the meaning I was very shocking cause where I come from race doesn't exist. The term African- American freaks me out every time cause they are born here why do we call them African-American?. so I'm not racist and I'm against slavery , the past is the past lets change it into a friendship word. but if nigger is used I think it sounds a little strong and racist, nigga is not.when I look at my aunts and uncles from my mother side I see that there is very light white skin color and there is very dark brothers , so lets say if two of the dark skin brothers start using the word nigga can the white brother use the word too?, or should they say "no you're not dark skin like we are you can't used it" what if the dark skin brothers listen to rock music and the really light skin listen to rap ? who is wrong? nigger is a racist word and nigga is a friendship word. I wont call a dark skin person that, unless they give me permission.

I think a lot of rap and hip-hop artist use it a lot so . A 7th grader who still never heard of the word "nigga" listens to a rap album and starts using the word around all his friends, maybe they don't know the meaning yet either but the word becomes more and more accepted until it becomes okay with everybody. why ? remember thats what you call your friends no somebody you hate.see how it becomes a friendship word, ah maybe I'm wrong.

(sorry if there spelling or grammar check needed)